It is not what I want that counts, it is what I have been given.
An opportunity, a life, a cage to roll around in, a wheel that I keep turning, to preserve its never-ending loop.
Inside of my cage, inside of my hamster wheel, there is no room for miracles, but there is room for heart.
And my heart keeps racing,
it keeps pacing,
tracing my small, but dedicated
and sometimes frantic steps.
Inside of my mind,
isolated from anything on the outside,
I wear myself out.
Anxiety and worry eat up all of my strength,
I fall from the wheel,
still fighting death.
My feet will be turning the wheel that has now gone,
a few moments more,
before I make peace with what is,
and I give up.
In this peace,
as I drift,
far away from flesh and bone, I’ll think –
boy, did I enjoy this life!
Spirit of Tara 